I use getting through as a life strategy. I get through one thing, and then another, and then another. Why do we speak of life events as something we need to get through?
I got through the holidays. More to the point, I got to spend precious time with my family. I felt like I was in a movie when I met my friend Sherill on a blustery day in a trendy bistro near Pike’s Market in Seattle; spirits were high; our conversation was magic; it was exciting to be on the streets instead of in the kitchen.
I tend to measure life as the next event I have to get through, instead of the next moment of anticipated joy. I think that’s because events always harbor unknowns. Will the plane arrive on time, the weather cooperate, our luggage make it to the turnstile? Will we all hold it together or will someone get put out, or get their feelings hurt? (We did quite well on all these fronts.)
What are the stresses that make us view a date marked on our calendar as a grit-your-teeth-and-go moment?
Time crunch
Events often require planning and preparation. That takes time away from our normal routine in which we have likely squeezed too many activities already. Something won’t get done. Something will fall through the cracks and come back to haunt us.
Fear of the known
I am driving to San Francisco this weekend to attend Poet’s & Writer’s Live. I hate to drive on the hills in the City by the Bay! Will my car get stuck in a vertical posture at the crest of a hill? Will I roll back and hit the car behind me before I can stomp the accelerator hard enough to move forward?
Fear of the unknown
The event is being held at the Brava Center. Never been there. Will I find parking? I’m going alone. Will I find people to hang out with? I’m planning to stay with my friend Charlene. Will that work out okay?
It’s a constant push to keep my comfort zone from shrinking. To that end, my New Year’s Resolutions present themselves.
I accept the challenge to keep my comfort zone clutter free to make room for what I truly care about. Far less distracting myself with social media. All those prompts to “check this out; read this; try that; sign up today…? Delete, delete, delete.
No! to calls for action that don’t align with my purpose. It’s time to face the truth. Literary fiction is what I write. There isn’t much market for it so far as I can tell. It isn’t lucrative, unless you get lucky. I’m in it for love, not money. I have to accept that if I don’t treat my writing as a business and churn out what’s popular, I will not be considered a serious writer.
Yes! to opportunities to spend face time with family, friends and neighbors, my community of writers, and readers of all persuasions. Nothing expands the borders of your comfort zone like making room for people.
Is your comfort zone shrinking or expanding? I ask this question with no judgement. There are seasons of life in which both are appropriate. I’d love to hear your thoughts.
photo credit: deeplifequotes via photopin cc
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